Exclusive: I came to Mumbai to do one film! shares Huma Qureshi on her journey and dreams
Olivia Owen general
Now that you have made a place for yourself in the film industry, what would you tell a younger Huma Qureshi today?
I would tell her to chill. And not to stress unnecessarily. That’s because during that phase, I would be constantly stressed and work myself into a frenzy, wondering whether things would work out or not.
You come from a non-film background, have a degree in history and are a fabulous actor who has had her share of struggles. How comfortable are you with all of it today?
There was a time when I was constantly trying to figure out who I was and trying to behave, sound and look like how I thought an actress should be. I come from a simple, middle class home in Delhi. My father sells kebabs for a living and my mother is a housewife. Our introduction to film stars and the film world was Filmfare. Shah Rukh Khan getting his Best Actor Filmfare Awards are some of the memories I have of growing up. I came to Mumbai to do one film. There was no plan after that because I never thought I could make it this far. Everything after my first film has been like a bonus. I am the sum total of all my mistakes and accomplishments and I wear them very proudly.
Are you emotionally affected by the roles that you play?
No! I am a very switch-on-switch-off actor. I could be laughing one moment and crying the next. The other day, Saqib (Saqib Saleem, her brother) was telling me that I was a very bad co-star. Everyone joins in when I do masti on the sets, but when the camera is turned on, they take time to get into character, whereas I just switch on. I have done theatre and I have my own process.
What were your auditions like? We've heard that you were body shamed a lot and there were rejections...
I came into the business in 2009. I didn’t have a manager or an agent, unlike today, when actors have a battalion of people around them. At that time, there used to be these coordinators who would send you messages about where the auditions were happening and the kinds of outfits required. I used to go from one audition to the next with a bag in which I carried one salwar kameez, one white shirt, one black dress and a tiffin box. Often, I would get rejected. And I never knew on what basis because, at times, the casting director hadn’t even interacted with me. I came from a protected home in Delhi, so I found that rude. But I had a bit of that rebellious Delhi nature and I would just shrug it off, thinking probably the person had had a bad day. But once I started doing films and people started reviewing my work and writing about me, I started feeling the harshness of it all. Even though there were good reviews written, the human mind only remembers the bad. And I would mull over the bad.
How did you deal with that?
There was never a year when I did not have a release, but I felt that something was not right. I could not identify the source of my not being happy. And then I figured it out. It was not about how I looked or what people were saying; it was about how I was thinking about myself. I had to quiet the chatter inside my head. Of course people are going to troll you and it’s never going to stop. It’s how you deal with it that makes the difference. Henceforth, I will be doing many more things, some of which will be successes and some of which will be failures, because in this business, you are either the best thing or the worst, there’s no middle ground. Hopefully, at the end of my lifespan as an actor, there will be more pluses than minuses.
Tell us what relationship advice Huma would give herself at 20 and then at 30.
I am an eternal romantic. I love being in love, expressing love and taking care of the people I love. So I would tell myself pretty much the same thing at 20 and 30: love in abundance, don’t be afraid to tell people what’s in your heart and be open to receiving love.
What are the lessons you have learnt in a relationship?
I take most people at face value and that includes romantic partners. Otherwise, you tend to overthink. And I have made that mistake many times. So I rely on people as opposed to overthinking.
And how do you avoid overthinking?
I think the first instinct about people is always correct. We should pay heed to that. And in your heart, you know what is good for you and what is not. After that, we start thinking about unnecessary issues. I remember a time when you spoke about body shaming and actors getting trolled for what they wear. Was the movie Double XL which was about two women and how they embrace their sizes, a response to that?
Double XL was not just a response to what I, Sonakshi Sinha, or even many men have faced. For me, it was a kind of therapy. I have been body shamed publicly. After my second film, a reviewer said that Huma Qureshi is a lovely actress, but she is five kilograms too heavy to be a mainstream actress. That really hurt. You know when I did Double XL, I put on 20 kg! I wanted to put myself out there because, for me, it was therapy. I had to disassociate myself from a character, who was a big girl, and say that it was not me. I will always be very proud of the film, though I wish it had done better at the box office! But it was a big achievement for Saqib and I, who managed to start our own company. And I believe that when people watch the film later, it will resonate with them.
Did your parents have any reservations about the provocative roles that you have played?
My parents had reservations even before I joined the film industry. I was mindful of this fact. I am very close to my father and he said that I should make him proud, or else I should come back and study further or join the family business. It was important that I make him proud of me. I remember when I took my family to see Gangs Of Wasseypur. After watching the first bit, he asked me whether I had used abusive language in the film and I swore that I hadn’t. For my family, it has been a learning curve, but it has been beautiful because they are very proud of the work that we do and have been very supportive. My parents are progressive but they had to figure out how to deal with the world that they live in.Has Saqib ever tried to moral police you?
Not at all. In fact, he stands up for me. Sometimes when my mom wants to say something, like she didn’t like what I wore in a film, I avoid having a conversation with her. Then she tells Saqib that he should tell me and he retorts that there is nothing wrong. He’s my defender. When we were growing up, we were not that close. When we came to Mumbai, we were staying separately at first, but then our parents insisted that we live together. Over the years, he has become my closest friend. I am seeing a different side of him. He doesn’t do anything at home, but at work, he has a different persona. He has organisational skills and can make decisions. It makes me proud of him. More on: Huma Qureshi
